If you have been searching all around the internet for happiness, congratulations! You are in the right place! I will show you how to be happy!
But first let me tell you a story...
A story about cockroaches, treasure, and happiness
When I was a young girl, I played with a bunch of kids in my apartment community back in India. We used to play in the community yard in a large group. One day, young minds decided to hunt for a buried treasure inside the community.
We really had no clue what we were doing. We were very excited to possibly find a treasure.
We dug a really large hole and ended up finding a whole load of cockroaches. We got really scared and ran away and never talked about it ever again.
Searching for happiness in adulthood is something like this story. We are all searching for it, sometimes in a group and sometimes by ourselves. Sometimes we end up digging holes in places where we really should not be looking in the first place.
As kids, we stopped digging for treasures after finding cockroaches. As adults though, people do not stop the quest for happiness. They continue looking for ways to be happy. In fact, several people on the internet are searching for ways to be happy daily.
Total monthly searches for the phrase “How To Be Happy” (including a lot of variations) turn out to be around 327290/month according to "Ubersuggest" keyword tool.
When I surveyed, I found that people have way too many made up stories about happiness.
If “...” happens, then I will be happy
I am unhappy because so and so does so and so which I do not agree with
You cannot buy happiness
Happiness is only for those who meditate/exercise/yoga/etc
Happy people are lazy
The negative people around me are bringing me down
I am too stressed to be happy
If I am happy, people will think I am a pushover
Happiness is the final destination
Happiness is all about pleasurable experiences
Happiness means always smiling
Happy people are annoying
You always have to spend time alone to be happier
It is selfish to be happy
It takes a lot of work to be happy
You need a lot of money to be happy
There is only one way to happiness
Happiness is for the older people to search for after retirement
Happiness is not here. I have to look for it
I need all my questions answered to be happy.
If people are vague or play mind games, I cannot be happy
In order to be happy, I need quiet time, calm and my time.
Happiness means intense happy emotions
When you read the above myths, you may find one thing common. Very few people are taking responsibility for their own happiness. They are focused on external factors and their belief systems. How others behave, what others cause, the relationship issues, the games they play is beyond our control. People have been conditioned to believe a certain way about happiness through their ancestors, parents, teachers, role models and society.
Sometimes changing jobs in order to get away from current problems can temporarily create happiness. But soon people find that old problems return in different ways. Same with changing partners or friends or careers.
In my coaching practice, I help people get unstuck from negative repeating cycles. If the root cause of a pattern is not identified, a person will be stuck in this cycle forever and misunderstand happiness. “Happiness is not for someone like me,” is what some of my clients say. They have made up their mind that they will never be happy. This belief is toxic and does not support well being of a person.
True happiness is inside all of us. You can access it at any time with proper understanding. For lasting happiness, layers of old beliefs and myths have to be removed to uncover the mask.
Resistance To Change
Low Self Esteem
Anger and Rage
Happiness has a big role in leading a successful fulfilled life. A lot of people are in search of happiness and stress out because they cannot find it in the things they most desire.
Happiness though is not a destination that someone has to reach or a desire that someone has to find.
Happiness is who you are. Happiness is inside of you. All you have to do is uncover all the layers that are masking it.
There are a number of ways to become happy, but the most effective one will depend on the pattern that is causing you this unhappiness.
For example, If you are always wanting more than what you have and have a "want more" pattern, then you have to get in touch of your inner core to align your actions, goals and values. You have to learn to celebrate your present moments and wins.
If you are sleep deprived and overworked, you have to learn to create your boundaries and give yourself the priority to connect with your happiness.
If you always need validation from everyone else and believe that you have no control over your life, then you have to connect with your self-worth to find your happiness.
Stop bumping into cockroaches when you can find the treasure of happiness inside of you. Take an inventory of your happiness and determine what is the #1 cause of unhappiness inside of your life.
Take the necessary action to solve the root cause and be happy now.
Copyright 2018-2019, STRESS LESS WITH SNEHA J